Tuesday, September 25, 2007
My sister's illness has taken a turn for the worst. The cancer has spread and the only other alternative is chemo, which the doctors have already said does not fight well against this particular type of cancer. Words have been coming out of all of our mouths recently that I thought (hoped) I would never have to acknowledge or even say. Words like...inoperable, terminal, death, heaven. Why? Why? Why? My sister is the most amazing person I have ever met. She is the most thoughtful and loving sister and friend. She is the mother that I pray to be one day. Why her? How am I going to handle the girls when she is gone? To even have those thoughts breaks my heart. The thoughts are necessary but extremely painful. I'm not ready for any of this yet.